Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I pour the whiskey from now on
I would fuck him just for his dog
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize