their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
In America we eat man semen.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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