3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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