I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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