what day is it and did you see me today?
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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