Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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