My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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