So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Randomize