Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
