happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
how drunk are you?
Several
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
