She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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