16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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