If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
soo... how was my night?
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
