Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Mom said you looked used
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
