She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize