It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Congratulations! We have a period
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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