he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
