So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
