Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Non-Jews are for practice
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
