My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
