you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
