She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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