Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
