I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
