Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
