So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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