My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
