You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
His hands were made for my vagina.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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