Dual....:-)
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize