just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
