Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
