Swine flu. Run for my life!
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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