Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
