I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize