The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
