I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
