Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
