in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Congratulations! We have a period
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize