It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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