yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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