How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
