the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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