I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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