Just fell off a train. Bad.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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