This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
