He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
