: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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