No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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