What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
