You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Randomize
