He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
