Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
